When you’ve got nothing to say, what you do instead is entertain yourself. That’s where it all comes from in the end, you see. There wasn’t such a crazy story amid all the chaos, there wasn’t anything I had to tell myself that had to be interesting. What I found was that the edge of it was in my gut because this was my place to loosen myself up and feel like I didn’t need to be entertaining, I could write something for the sake of moving my fingers on a keyboard and not worry about whether anyone would like it or not. In fact, I could be sure they would not because their attention is not the point.
What is the difference between being entertained and being merely amused? Amusement is scrolling, it’s going post after post getting tiny little excitements. Entertainment is more sustained, it builds a connection of some kind. It’s something you carry with you afterward. It tells a story, maybe that’s the really important thing. It brings you somewhere else. It lights up some part of the brain that’s not always engaged, something that doesn’t get turned on often enough to become dull.
Eventually you get it together and learn something. You get the point, you get all the basics coming at you and you learn to pick up the pieces. Eventually the fight wears on and you get used to it. I feel bad for you if you’re reading this trying to learn something or pick something up — this is raw output for the sake of unclogging the hose.